I was never very good at Twister. I just never seemed to be able to contort my body into the unnatural reef knots that the spinning arrow and multi-coloured tablecloth demanded. However, after an hour-and-a-half with Kong I'm certain I could put those double-jointed Mongolian circus twins to shame.

With arms as strong as his demeanour is gentle, and the flexibility of Angelina Jolie on a good Tomb Raider day, Kong is perhaps the best Thai masseuse west of Chiang Mai, his hometown in northern Thailand.

From the hill tribes of Chiang Mai to the horsey-set of the Natal Midlands; Kong is one of six Thai massage therapists brought over to twist, contort, crack and destress highly-strung city-dwellers who make the wise decision to chill out at Karkloof Spa in the green, green hills outside Pietermaritzburg.

As a region, the area is perhaps not as sexy as the North Coast or Garden Route, but as soon as you turn in the gates of Karkloof you might as well call me Adam.
With its lush landscapes stretching up into the valleys, delicious food (not mere apples) on offer at every turn and dozens of Eves offering every spa treatment known to man this is a Garden of Eden wild horses couldn't drag me away from.

However, it's not wild horses you'll find roaming the 3500 hectares of Karkloof. In addition to the spa Karkloof is a private nature reserve that's stocked with animals great and small, from rhino to warthog and almost everything in between. The only thing you won't find here are elephant and big cats, which means it's safe to explore parts of the reserve (which are kept free of buffalo and rhino) on foot or mountain bike.

If wild and woollies sound simply too daunting the 17 treatment rooms and army of therapists make Karkloof one of the largest destination spas in South Africa, where you can steam yourself serene before indulging in a range of treatment 'journeys'. The Thai massage is, however, the main attraction and one not to be missed.

After Kong has limbered you up for the Twister World Championships with a 90-minute traditional Thai massage you'll be hard-pressed to do more than amble off to the spa's 'Tranquility Lounge' to contemplate the verdant Karkloof Valley.

With green hills rolling to the horizon and the 105-metre Karkloof Falls rumbling away in the distance, the view is – to steal a phrase from a man born not far from here – lovely beyond any singing of it.

A visit to Karkloof is certainly not your usual Big Five safari escape, but an agreeable blend of game viewing, spa treatments, fine living and the great outdoors.

IF YOU GO…
Where it is: Twenty-four kilometres outside Pietermaritzburg
Why go there: Apart from enjoying the best Thai massage in the country, it's a retreat where your time is your own. Dine, spa, explore and relax on your own terms. There are no hard-and-fast schedules and 'what-you-want-when-you-want-it' is the name of the game.
What it offers: One of South Africa's top spa retreats. Apart from the 17 therapy rooms and bevy of therapists, there's an extensive hydro-area offering everything from hot-and-cold Kneipp pools to saunas and Roman Baths. Sixteen spacious villas dot the hillside below the spa, offering gorgeous views of the Karkloof valley from every angle.
What it's like: Luxurious, without being pretentious. The down-to-earth owners ensure there's enough extravagance for a pampering weekend away, without going over the top.
And the food: Outstanding. Indulge in the chef's gourmet creations, or stick with the regular raw food option which proves detoxing doesn't have to be deadly boring. The impressive wine cellar offers some of South Africa's top vintages… you'll be spoilt for choice.
Rates: R3990 per person per night sharing, fully inclusive of all meals and beverages. This also includes a complimentary 60-minute massage voucher on arrival, use of the spa during your stay and one game drive/walk daily.
Getting there: Follow the N3 to Pietermaritzburg and take Exit 81 towards Greytown. Turn left into Otto's Bluff Road and follow this for 20-kilometres. After Morton's Drift, look out for the Karkloof Spa sign to your left.
Contact: Visit www.karkloofspa.com to find out more, or call 033 569 1321. You can also email This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .

LOCAL ATTRACTION
Once you're settled at Karkloof you won't want to leave, so make the most of your time on the property with a trip to the Karkloof Falls. Tucked in a quiet corner of the reserve, the area is safe to explore on foot or bike and you can even pack a picnic and spend the day at one of the scenic viewpoints. A wooden walkway has been built over the slippery sandstone boulders allowing you to wander to within the spray from the Falls.

In season you can cast a line for Yellowfish further downstream in the Karkloof River; on a catch-and-release basis of course. Or lace up your walking shoes and take a stroll through the dense forests where Knysna Loeries hide in the shadows. Make sure you pack the binoculars… over 300 species of birds have been identified on the reserve, including the Bronze-Naped Pigeon unique to the area.

» Originally published in the Sunday Times, December 7 2008.

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