Sadly, the new dim sum menu at Beluga not really up to scratch. Even at half-price before 7pm. Stodgy dough on siu mai and har gau; bland flavours in steamed buns; prawns were minced, not whole; ponzu sauce served in bottles reminiscent of Spur circa-1987. And no pork! No pork in dim sum? What next!?

Har gau with spinach and cream cheese… that’s what! Lord above, it brings a tear to my eye just to think of how they’re murdering my favourite Asian snack.

Potstickers not bad, but overall the fillings would raise a revolt in Canton. When was the last time you saw beef fillet- and springbok-filled dim sum in Hong Kong, exactly?

To be honest, it looks like they're thrown authenticity out the window in favour of appealing to the hungry masses. Flavours all completely off-key for this wonderful staple of Cantonese cooking. So all in all, simply not worth it. So far Kitima in Hout Bay is at the top of the Cape Town dim sum ranking... now if only they had a bigger selection.

The sushi top-up wasn't bad, but 1890 in Obs still superior for similar prices. For the first time we actually had a good waiter, but the cooler-than-thou blonde hostesses that 'greet' customers can really go and take a flying leap... have they never heard the word 'hospitality', I wonder? No warmth, no concern for your dining experience, just attitude, attitude, attitude. Won’t someone from Societi Bistro please go and give them some lessons?

And to top it off, the outdoor area was a fug of nicotine-tinged smoke... not really conducive to enjoying one’s food, no? So yes, that was officially the last time I will eat at Beluga. If anyone has more tips for dim sum in Cape Town, I’m all ears...

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